Kyoo 47

It's hard to get everything I'm feeling jam-packed into a blog. Try dumping an entire bottle of laundry detergent into the washer and then keeping the lid closed. I think it's comparable.

I want so many things right now. I'm not talking about material things, I'm talking about experiences. I think I'm getting bored with my school because I'm too comfortable there now. I know what to expect and I know how to get around. I want something bigger and even more challenging. I want to scoop myself up and hurl myself into the unknown.

My life is too predictable. I want to be a bird, perched upon a tree on a golden spring day, with the ability to launch in an infinite number of degrees of directions: up, down, up-left, up-right, down-left, down-right, down-down-right, left-left-up, and so on.

The bird can view all its options and then just go anywhere it wants to. Flying is freedom. I want to fly.

I guess I do have this option. Maybe it's the guts I'm lacking?

I think I'm just stuck in the middle of my education. I'm experiencing the college version of tweens. I don't have all the responsibilities of adults, but I'm also expected to use more wits than a teenager. Why do I always feel like I'm in a transition phase of life? Maybe transition is normal. When I look back on the "old times" they seem stable. Yet, I distinctly remember myself thinking they were transitionary too.

Destinations are just the beginning of something new. Why must I be so focused on getting to each destination? Can't I ever just enjoy where I am now while I'm working towards the next destination?

Okay, I think my washing machine is flowing out the top.

On vacation, my dad tried to save my sister's camera from falling on the concrete and ended up drop-kicking it into a rock. It was pretty funny.

The freedom that camera must have felt....

Life is wonderful. But sometimes I wonder if I'm pushing myself enough and experiencing what I need to. Am I really doing all I can do?

So many questions.

Have a great day :)